human – The Diary of The Deranged Writer

XVIII: Full Circle II (The Diary’s 2nd Anniversary)

2 years ago yesterday, I published my first post here on The Diary. And looking back at those 2 years… oh, man, I have been through a lot.

In my first year of blogging on The Diary, I promised myself to publish 13 posts per month and I will blog every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Thankfully, I reached my post goals and schedule mainly because of my Minute Warning series (where I write anything under time pressure under 10 to 30 minutes). And if I were to publish a longer post, I have a writing process that works. You can check my first-year retrospective on this post.

And today, in my second year of blogging at The Diary, I’m looking back and checking if my writing processes still work and if my blogging schedule still serves me well.

10-Minute Warning CL

What can I write here under 10 minutes?

I need to get this off my chest: I give up. I can’t force myself to blog twice or thrice today to reach my blog count for October 2024. A part of my mind wants to push myself, but I’ve been so mentally unwell lately that it also affected my physical health. My entire being is so weak. That is also why I didn’t go for a walk/jog even if I promised to work out more.

But even if I’m physically and mentally healthy, I can’t blog twice or thrice in one day. I wish I was a writing machine, but I’m not. I’m only human and I can only blog once a day. I was also planning on blogging for 14 days from November 22 to my birthday December 5 (just like what I did in 2023), but in my current weak state, I’m worried that I might fail again like how I failed this September and October 2024.

Fuck this shit.

God & Satan

God’s coolest winter
Satan’s summer evens things
Why can’t I have both? Ω

Originally published on April 5, 2019.

Image header: Pixabay and Adonyi Gábor of Pexels.