Sleeping soundly while my heart is full of glee
My mind drifts to a different kind of paradise
I walk in fresh nature with someone special
Light everlasting, the cool air comforts the skin
Every second of this joy feels like eternity
Ω
Smile (Poetry Series): I, II, III
Header image: Matthew Montrone of Pexels. Edited in Adobe Photoshop 2025.
OK. What can I tell here in under 10 minutes?
Since April 29, I have been trying to sleep and wake up early. Truly. I have been drinking my nightly medicine at 9pm, and it helped me sleep early. But the downside of drinking my nightly medicine is that I sleep longer than I want to. Sometimes, when I drink my meds at 9pm, I also wake up at 9am. Sometimes, I drink my meds at 9pm, and I wake up early… but I feel dazed and confused after. That’s insane.
I feel like my body got used to sleeping more because of the meds, and as much as I love sleeping for longer hours (and I quote my therapist once again, “sleep is medicine”), I want to go back to the normal 8-9 hours of proper sleep. I need to talk to my therapist about adjusting the medicine intake soon.
In the meantime, I drank my nightly medicine at 8:30pm. Will this work? I will see about that. I don’t feel slee… oh, there you go. My fingers are getting numb now. See you in the next post.
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Have you ever had a dream so happy that you wish the dream would never end? That’s the kind of dream that I had last Sunday, and I woke up feeling happy… and then my smile turned into a frown. It was only a dream.
“But Dewey, it was just a dream. Don’t worry about it.” That’s the thing: It was only a dream.
Since then, I have been struggling to bounce back. I had a hard time fixing my sleeping schedule. I had a hard time finishing my work tasks faster. I had a hard time basically being fine. If I were to add a piece of melancholic background music to my current predicament, it would be “Metamorphosis: One” by Philip Glass. It is one of my favorite sad songs ever.
And coincidentally, a year ago today, I also blogged about “Metamorphosis: One” as a Song of the Moment. I only found out after searching the old post. (If you click on the aforementioned link, there’s a spoiler warning if you have not seen “return 0”, the final episode of my all-time favorite series Person of Interest.)
Anyway, even if I’m sad, I will try to keep going. I have to.
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Header image: Danila Perevoshchikov of Pexels. Edited in Adobe Photoshop 2025.
Published on February 19, 2025 at 11:07pm. Edits were made at 11:26pm.
The Diary of The Deranged Writer 