friendship – The Diary of The Deranged Writer

The Worst Heartbreak

It breaks my heart that I don’t have hers
But what’s worse than this incredible ache?
Seeing her break down after burning out

It breaks my heart that she doesn’t love me
But what’s worse than not being loved back?
Her loss of passion and reason to keep going

It breaks my heart that we will never kiss
But what’s worse than our lips not touching?
Her being numb after life keeps hurting her

It breaks my heart, we’ll never be together
But what’s worse than my worst heartbreak?
Erasing our dear friendship from existence

I’d rather carry the worst heartbreak ever
And still offer her a shoulder to cry on
Her kind soul needs a cleansing catharsis

I’d rather carry the worst heartbreak ever
And also the burden that is on her shoulders
She is never alone, even during her battles

I’d rather carry the worst heartbreak ever
And keeping choosing her joy, day and night
Even if that means she chooses someone else

I’d rather carry my worst heartbreak ever
Her sweetest smile is still worth the hurt
And her heartbreak matters more than mine

Header image: Marek Studzinski of Unsplash. Edited in Adobe Photoshop 2026.

Song of the Moment CXVI: Motörhead’s”Till the End”

For the past several days, I’ve been all ears on all of Motörhead’s studio albums in chronological order, and last Saturday, March 28, I finally reached the last album Lemmy ever recorded with his long-time bandmates (released in 2015), Bad Magic. One song that hit me harder than their usual fast-paced ones was the slow-tempo yet still heavy track “Till The End.”

XLVIII: Exchanging Digital Letters

Instant messaging has to be one of the greatest modern inventions known to man. Despite the distance, one can now easily message someone with a few clicks, and the recipient can reply in minutes or even seconds. I send “How are you?” to someone, and I get “I’m good! How are you?” right after, and we can take it from there.